Some thoughts on parenting

• What are the purposes of parenting…
  • …for the child?

A family unit is where children learn moral, and what brings human capital to the world.

• …for the parents?

I would say that parents are the ones who benefit the most from parenting.  Parenting can refine a person.

• …for the marriage?

I have learned that parenting can either strengthen or damage a marriage, it is important to take the steps towards marital fulfillment even while being a parent.

• Imagine that a good friend, “If God wants me to be a parent he’ll just let me know what I need to do when the time comes. After all, isn’t being a parent a matte of instinct?” How might you respond to your friend in the most helpful way possible, given your awareness of the value of informed efforts within the family?

This person obviously doesn’t understand the divine role a parent has.  I would help this person learn that parenting is a difficult but fulfilling task.  It is also important in a person’s level of satisfaction throughout their life.

• Another friend states, “Why would I need t learn about parenting? I learned from the best.  I had fantastic parents and I turned out great!” Irrespective of his assessment of how he turned out, how might you encourage this friend to carefully prepare for parenthood and the types of decisions he will make.

It is important that a parent understands that each child is different.  And therefore, requires different parenting.  Even the active approach to parenting recognizes this.

• Michael Popkin, the creator of the Active Parenting program—states that all children have the needs for
  • Contact and belonging
  • Power
  • Protection
  • Challenge
  • and Withdrawal (occasional breaks from )

Which needs to you believe are most important? On what evidence would you base your opinion? Would you alter or amend this list? If so, how and why?
I think that the needs that are most important are dependent on the child.   For some children it is important for them to have a sense of belonging, and for others it is most important that they feel challenged at times.  For example, when my nephew doesn’t feel a challenge, he is automatically turned off and board.  But my niece, his sister, needs to feel as though she belongs and is protected where ever she goes.  I think that this list is quite accurate.  Kids need all of these things to have balance in their lives.    

Family work

Here is some food for thought on Family work:

http://magazine.byu.edu/?act=view&a=151

http://youtu.be/1UV3ZF8OvOA

Stay at home moms

Some wonder why so many Mormon moms decide to stay at home instead of: "contribute to society," or "put their intellect to use."  They wonder if those stay at home mom's are: "wasting their brains."  The Family A Proclamation to the World states:

"Husband and wife have a solemn responsibility to love and care for each other and for their children. “Children are an heritage of the Lord” (Psalm 127:3). Parents have a sacred duty to rear their children in love and righteousness, to provide for their physical and spiritual needs, and to teach them to love and serve one another, observe the commandments of God, and be law-abiding citizens wherever they live. Husbands and wives—mothers and fathers—will be held accountable before God for the discharge of these obligations.

The family is ordained of God. Marriage between man and woman is essential to His eternal plan. Children are entitled to birth within the bonds of matrimony, and to be reared by a father and a mother who honor marital vows with complete fidelity. Happiness in family life is most likely to be achieved when founded upon the teachings of the Lord Jesus Christ. Successful marriages and families are established and maintained on principles of faith, prayer, repentance, forgiveness, respect, love, compassion, work, and wholesome recreational activities. By divine design, fathers are to preside over their families in love and righteousness and are responsible to provide the necessities of life and protection for their families. Mothers are primarily responsible for the nurture of their children. In these sacred responsibilities, fathers and mothers are obligated to help one another as equal partners. Disability, death, or other circumstances may necessitate individual adaptation. Extended families should lend support when needed."

Here is an article that discusses: "Does a Full-Time Homemaker Swap Her Mind for a Mop?" By Dennis Prager.

http://www.dennisprager.com/columns.aspx?g=8e8f6ecd-d9c8-4bc0-a4bb-ad12d301044b&url=does_a_full-time_homemaker_swap_her_mind_for_a_mop

More thoughts on Gay Marriage

It makes more sense now, why more people don't try to fight their same sex attraction.  This would be a very difficult struggle to have throughout life.  But I have also learned that it is only an earthly trial.  And that same sex attraction will not follow us after we die. There is a lot of evidence that points toward same sex attraction being a condition you are born with, but we learned this week that there is a validating argument for the contrary.  This was said by Simon LeVay, a neuroscience author on sexuality.